vestimentary practices |
2006-01-23
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Last Friday as I left work I was zipping up against the cold. Now, my vest has two zippers (it has some extra flaps which I suppose are there for style, though it's fun to match the wrong zipper ends on purpose and look like an art house painter), and I was wearing a surf fabric sweater with a zipper as well.
Without looking I zipped up quickly and instead of hearing the comforting sound of a zip well done, it made that tearing noise zippers do when the teeth are not locking even though the zipper goes all the way up. Oops. I had matched my vest's left end with my sweater's right end.
Normally when your zipper didn't close up properly you pull out one of the two ends all the way back down. I did so with my vest end, but when finally reaching the end with my one arm over my head and the other on the inside and out down, my body slanted to the left for balance, I was still stuck because the zipper wouldn't go past the entry chain.
I did not want to ruin my vest and sweater, so the only way out was to call someone to come over and help me get the other chain all the way down as well by pulling on the other side. Of course, I had to kill him afterwards to keep the embarassment a secret. So if you don't see Jamal today - you know why.